Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

[The Uruks run from Helm's Deep and into a line of trees.]

Èomer: "Stay out of the forest! Keep away from the trees!"

[The Uruks run into the forest. It groans and sways. Horrible sounds emerge.]

[Èowyn touches Aragorn's face and smiles. The two embrace.]


[The Rohirrim are clearing Uruk bodies. Gimli sits on one, smoking his pipe.]

Legolas: "Final count: fourty-two."

Gimli: "Fourty-two?! That's not bad for a pointy-eared Elvish princeling."

Gimli: "I myself am sitting pretty on fourty-three."

[Legolas frowns. He draws his bow and shoots Gimli's Uruk.]

Legolas: "Fourty-three."

Gimli: "He was already dead."

Legolas: "He was twitching."

Gimli: "He was twitching because he's got my axe embedded in his nervous system!"

[Gimli wiggles the axe handle, making the Uruk twitch.]


[Merry and Pippin stand waist-deep in water. They look up at the balcony of Orthanc.]

Merry: "He doesn't look too happy, does he?"

Pippin: "Not too happy at all, Merry."

[Saruman and Wormtounge stalk along the balcony.]

Merry: "Still, I suppose the view would be quite nice form up there."

Pippin: "Oh yes, a quality establishment. I hear the staff are very good."

[Merry surreptitiously tries to measure his height against Pippin's. Pippin looks back at him, and Merry pretends to be picking something out of his hair.]

Pippin: "What are you doing?"

Merry: "Nothing. The world's back to normal, that's all."

Pippin: "No it isn't. I'm starving."

Merry: "Good luck trying to find something decent around here. Probably only dead rats and moldy bread."

[Pippin finds an apple floating in the water. He looks up, then he smiles.]

[More apples are floating.]

[He grabs them, then drops them to pick up a roast chicken, then finds a whole basket of apples. Merry finds a carafe of wine. They enter a storeroom filled with food.]

Merry: "Saruman's storeroom!"

[They see barrels marked 'Southfarthing'.]

Pippin: "I don't believe it."

Merry: "It can't be."

Pippin: "It is."

[They open a barrel.]

Merry: "Longbottom Leaf. The finest pipe-weed in South Farthing."

Pippin: "It's perfect. One barrel each. Wait. Do you think we should share it with Treebeard?"

Merry: "Share it? No. No. Dead plant and all that. Don't think he'd understand. Could be a distant relative."

Pippin: "I get it. Don't be hasty."

Merry: "Exactly. Bar-hrum."

[Treebeard peeks into the storeroom as smoke begins to billow out.]


[Faramir and the hobbits wade through the flooded city to an alcove. Gollum follows.]

Faramir: "This is the old sewer. Runs right under the river through to the edge of the city. You'll find cover in the woods there."

Sam: "Captain Faramir, you have shown your quality, sir. The very highest."

Faramir: "The Shire must truly be a great realm, Master Gamgee, where gardeners are held in high honor. What road will you take once you reach the woods?"

Frodo: "Gollum says there's a path near Minas Morgul that climbs up into the mountains."

Faramir: "Cirith Ungol?"

[Gollum crawls past him.]

[Faramir grabs Gollum and holds him by the neck.]

Faramir: "Is that it's name?"

Gollum: "No. No! Yes."

Faramir: "Frodo, they say a dark terror dwells in the passes above Minas Morgul. You cannot go that way."

Gollum: "It is the only way. Master says we must go to Mordor, so we must try."

Frodo: "I must."

[Faramir throws Gollum down.]

Faramir: "Go, Frodo. Go with the goodwill of all Men."

Frodo: "Thank you."

[Frodo and Sam start off. Faramir grabs Gollum again.]

Faramir: "May death find you quickly if you bring them to harm."

[He flings Gollum toward the sewer. Gollum limps away.]

Sam: "Come on. Keep up! Mister Frodo didn't mean for them Rangers to hurt you. You know that, don't you? He was tryin' to save you, see?"

Gollum: "Save me?"

Sam: "So there's no hard feelings. Forgive and forget."

Gollum: "No, no. No hard feelings."

Sam: "Very decent of you. Very decent indeed, Gollum."